"I LEARNED TO DREAM ... AND I WILL NOT STOP"
The resilience: a healthy challenge for the whole family system
Dr. Laura Bonanni
What happens in a family when an albino child is born?
So many questions, fears, negative fantasies, disappointment, puzzlement, a certain social "abandon" feeling (sometimes), the need to know more, need to share, drop the expectations for the child. The family have overhaul itself!
We speak then of resilience, that reactive ability of people to fight the adversity.
Resilience can be seen as the strength of mind, as the construction of a proper frame of mind, facilitated by the presence of protective factors, made more difficult by risk factors.
We are born children, we become adults! The task of the family is to transmit the child the tools necessary and sufficient to build a resilient personality structure that will accompany the child of today and the adult of tomorrow along the journey of life in the certainty of knowing that if we "fall" we will have a chance to get up and every dream takes you beyond "walls and boundaries", always remembering to ourselves and our children that "the secret of life is sharing" (Lucia Pellegrini).
There is a golden thread that links the process of growing to the autonomy, and is the right to exist in an unconditional way beyond any disability we have: the human being needs unconditional love. When a child understands, perceives, feels to be a "disappointment" to his parents, he can develop over time a sense of insecurity which may risk to become the backbone of his personality, like a "mental posture" and therefore much more difficult to manage and tackle, becoming a more constraining limits than the genetic limit itself.